"Coaching" and "mentoring" have been popular buzz words for awhile - "sponsorship" appears to be yet another with some growing momentum and traction. In some organizations, they may appear to have all but come and gone - in others they have really "stuck" and made a big difference. Why?
I would suggest that they have survived and thrived most prevalently in environments where they have evolved from programs to natural and expected behaviors. These behaviors likely include a distinguishing dialogue that has become part of day-to-day life and interaction. I would also suggest that some degrees of innovation and steadfast commitment have played a part.
"Programs" tend to require funding and resources that are vulnerable to the potential realities of budget constraints and cuts - not unfamiliar dynamics in recent years. Programs also run the risk of being replaced by other programs when it's time for something new and fresh.
Additionally, there is such a thing as over-engineering what ultimately distills to trusted and professionally intimate dialogue between human beings.
In some enterprises, coaching and mentoring were entirely foreign concepts initially and required very structured programs to jump-start and socialize the behaviors and activities supporting the underlying concepts and objectives. In others, the culture may have been primed such that the journey had already begun and was more straightforward, shorter, and unimpeded.
One hurdle I observe with regularity is the notion of "permission." People sometimes linger on the sidelines waiting for permission or a formal invitation to coach or mentor. While it's true there is only so much you can do for others who may not be receptive to being supported in such ways; it's important to remember that those on the other side of the dance floor may be too "shy" to reach out for assistance and support. They may even fear their requests for support may be perceived as signs of weakness or deficiency. This is where the dynamics of an organization's culture are particularly significant factors.
In my material on the topic, I make the point that many leaders (present company included) have spent untold hours wringing our hands over precise and exclusive definitions for each of coaching, mentoring, and counseling (the latter sometimes known by other names - e.g. "advising"). Personally, I have come to believe that the behaviors, dialogue, and activities associated with each are more important than the respective labels, roles, and "hats" per se. There are synergies among them and there is value in differentiating them. For example, "sharing experiences" is often associated with mentoring; however, it can add value in the course of coaching and counseling dialogue as well.
Cliche as it may sound, it really does start at the top with leadership. It is challenging for some people to effectively and gracefully demonstrate with authenticity the behaviors associated with coaching, mentoring, and counseling if they have never experienced "it" themselves by way of being on the receiving end. Some are naturally inclined and inspired to exhibit these behaviors. Others embrace the compelling business cases for each. But there remains yet another category of people who may consciously or not so consciously harbor a "no one did this for me so I'm not going to do it for someone else with all that much gusto" perspective.
Experiencing "it" and paying it forward really do make a difference.
I recall facilitating many a discussion where new leaders and managers with their hearts in all the right places were stressed out over the many "hats" they were expected to wear. "How will I ever find the time to learn how to be a great coach, a terrific mentor, and a world class counselor - let alone actually do it all!? - I'm already supposed to be selling new business, recruiting, leading teams, managing people..." My counsel was then and is now:
- Take a deep breath or two.
- Contemplate the opportunities you have to interact with others in the course of what you already do.
- Consciously consider the behaviors you might demonstrate (or perhaps are already demonstrating) consistent with your interest in and your organization's vision of coaching, mentoring, and counseling others.
- Think about the dialogues you initiate and build - the conversations you have.
- Identify the similarities among those behaviors and dialogues - you may be surprised by all the points of intersection and the associated opportunities. While not necessarily a silver bullet, it may be as much about will as it is about skill.
Thoughtfully and strategically integrating the behaviors supporting coaching, mentoring, and counseling into competency models (e.g. shared/core, leadership, management, supervision) and role expectations can bring those behaviors to life in several ways:
- In my article introduction, I suggest that the things people define, measure, and discuss are the things that actually "get done." Consider a progressive continuum that isn't realized or achieved in one step overnight - it is indeed a journey that might include:
- Defining these behaviors in ways that support your organization's objectives and unique culture.
- Encouraging their continuous development (e.g. by linking them to resources - in addition to training, there are many online tools).
- Measuring them (e.g. via 360/upward feedback)
- Assessing and discussing them in ways that work within your developmental and evaluative assessment frameworks. Ultimately, linking them to recognition and reward of course drives a higher level of accountability.
- Throughout my material, I emphasize how competencies can be used to "paint the picture for..." In this case, behavioral anchors supporting competency definitions can be used to describe the specific activities and behaviors supporting coaching, mentoring, and counseling - and in words that resonate for your organization, its vision, and its values. While there are some tried-and-true core principles specific to each, they can mean somewhat different things in different cultures and environments - and that's okay!
- Behaviors described in competency models give people a tangible sense of ownership for, responsibility for, and even "permission" to demonstrate them. Remember the "permission" dilemma described previously? It can be kind of a big deal for some. In fact, one of my favorite definitions of coaching is:
"Structured encouragement and skill-building with permission in the interest of achieving incremental performance"
Making the investment to describe and communicate the competencies, traits, and behaviors that can make a difference in YOUR organization serves everyone well - supply and demand alike (i.e. coaches/coachees, mentors/mentees, counselors/counselees, and advisors/advisees) by:
- Creating a primed and expectant demand which helps "break the ice."
- Creating an accountable and motivated supply which increases the likelihood the behaviors will be demonstrated.
- Leveraging inquiry and productive dialogue skills to get the balls rolling...
Programs, while they have their time, place, and purpose; can sometimes start to feel a little like outsourcing or over-scripting what are some of the richest opportunities to connect people to their organizations - natural, authentic, and effective developmental dialogue.
More information:
- Click here for my take on some succinct definitions for each of coaching, mentoring, counseling, and sponsorship as well as further exploration of synergy/differentiation and selection.
- IC2 core curricula includes a "Coaching, Mentoring, and Counseling - Integrating the Behaviors and Dialogue into Day-to-Day Work" course.
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